The Next Rotation - The Universe of Fenris Fox
31 December 2006
 
Miniature Short Story: "Repossession: A Ghostbusters Parody"

Just a random idea I got - more stuff along the line of "no good deed goes unpunished." If you've ever wished you could take back something good you did for somebody because they didn't pay (or - if you did it for free - they rubbed your nose in the dung), this story is for you. =xoD

***

REPOSSESSION:
A Ghostbusters Parody
By Fenny F.
Written 12/31/2006; Original Web Release, First Edition, 12/31/2006

DISCLAIMER: This work is a parody of another work of fiction, as has been deemed protected by the Supreme Court of the United States. The ideas therein are not representative of the creators, writers, animators, directors, producers, and/or copyright holders of the Ghostbusters movies, series, or characters.
Do not bend, fold, crush, or incinerate. Keep out of the reach of children. Contents are hot. Do not use while sleeping. This tag not to be removed under penalty of law, except by consumer. This data may cause your computer to create a monumental belch from the subwoofer. Paper and ink may pose a choking hazard for children under 5 seconds old. May contain content unsuitable for adults. Your mileage may vary. Electrons may cause trees to plummet. Use at your own risk. Sold as-is. Void where prohibited by law. Not to be eaten with Ramen by the Postmaster General unless watching anime with girls in sailor outfits.

***
CHAPTER I

One day, Peter and Ray were in the firehouse, eating pizza.. or at least trying.

"Slimer!" Peter exclaimed, "That's the second piece of pizza you've ruined for me today!"
The comical ghost replied with his usual babble of incomprehensible sounds.
"What do you mean, 'I didn't do anything?' You swiped the first slice right out of my hand, and I don't think any of us *humans* here would eat that other slice," Peter said whilst pointing at the nasty remains of said slice in a nearby trashcan.
"You know, with all this waste, we're going to have to get some of the bills paid up," Ray said.
"Yeah.. the dead beats ain't helpin' any. We need to find a way to convince some of 'em."

At that moment, Egon came up from the basement, a small toolkit in hand - most likely after maintenance to the ghost containment unit. "What's all the commotion about up here?"
"Dead beats," Ray replied.
"Slimed-up pizza," Peter added.
"What a shame," Egon said.. while looking in Peter's direction.
"Hey, I've got an idea," Peter said.
"Oh Lord," Egon said. "Let's hear it."
"Well, why don't we be like any other company - when you don't pay, they repossess."
"Umm," Egon said while scratching his head, "I don't know how we can repossess a service."
"It has to do with our type of service."
"Oh boy.. I'm afraid to think of what you may have come up with," Ray said with a sigh.
"Why don't we unleash their nightmare back upon them?"

Ray nearly spit soda halfway across the room; Egon almost had to run for the john due to an accident.

"Are you kidding me, Peter! We'd just have to break our butts rounding them up again. We'd be lucky if we don't end up in the slammer for some stupid crime!" Ray said, shocked halfway to Japan.
"Not to mention," Egon added with his knowledge, "The ghosts are already in the containment unit. You know how hard it was just to get *my* soul out of there that one time..."
"Well, of course we can't go that far back," Peter replied, "but we keep some of the weaker ones in the traps for a while. And if I remember right..."
"A few of them are in the basement," Ray contributed.
"And those aren't too dangerous, or too strong. But they would scare the bejesus out of a deadbeat."
"I don't know if I like this," Egon said, "but I've heard - and done - worse."
"Grab the traps, fellas," Ray exclaimed. "We're paying a visit to 36th Street."

***
CHAPTER II

Loaded with proton weaponry, ghost traps, and EMI meters, the trio stepped out of the car at the flat of a former customer. They marched up the stairs, and buzzed the doorbell.

"Who is it?" a rough-voiced man answered.
"Your friendly neighborhood ghost collectors," Peter said sarcastically.
"What the hell do you want? Your job's done."
"We ain't a charity, buster. We want our dough."
"Heh. Make me."
"If you insist..."

Ray chuckled, as Egon sprung open a trap containing a small spectre captured from the man's apartment a couple days ago. The little ghost almost seemed to know what was going on.. he giggled as he flew up into the air, and through the wall. A blood-curdling scream was audible - without the aid of the intercom.

"What the f*** are you doing?! Get this thing out of here!" the deadbeat screams.
"No, we won't, until you pay. And as far as what we're doing.. it's called, 'repossession.'"

All the Ghostbusters - and even the little ghost - laughed heartily, as the ruckus continued upstairs.

"I think we've got ourselves a winning technique, Peter," said Ray.
"Yup. Pay up, or pray up."

THE END.

***
 
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Assorted writings & artwork of a furry. Sometimes presented from the point-of-view of the author's "fursona" (personal furry): Fenris "Fenny" Fox, the futuristic kitsune.

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